Post by Tim Bruening75 days to December 12.
It's November 12th. Iyyyy'm looking forward to. I get £250s' worth of free
money from off of the State around that time! My Winter Fue - ooo - el
Allowance.
Just think. All those Polly Titians and Civil Swervants all pretending to be
Good King Whatsizzname . . er . . Wenceslass! That's it!
Version 1.
Good thing Whatsizname looked out,
On the feast of Stephen -
For that poor man being a sight,
He would still be greivin'.
Brightly shone the moon that night,
David Frost was cruel.
Stealing all the poor man's nosh,
All his wood, his muuuu - uuuuel.
"Hither page and stand by me,
And thou please bend over,
If you want a nice surprise,
Tell me who's that rover!"
"Sire, that'll cost you fifty pence,
Coz my costs are mountin'
Him there lives inside the pipe
That feeds St. Agnes' fou - ountain!"
2.
Good King Whatsizname looked out
On the feast of Steeeeeeeephen.
There he saw a dirty lout,
With his hair uneeeeeeeeven.
Brightly shon the Goon that night,
Though Grittpipe was cruuuuu-el.
Broke into Min's little house -
Stole her winter fuuuuu-uuuuuu-el!
or . .
Good King Whatsizname looked out
On the feast of Steeeeeeeephen.
There he saw a dirty lout,
With his hair uneeeeeeeeven
Brightly shon the Goon that night,
Coz the lad was Ehhhhcles,
Chasing turkeys with a knife
And some Branston Piiii-iiii-cles.
3.
Good King Whatsizname looked out -
Felt his knuckles tingle.
Then he aimed a mighty punch
At the chin of Kringle.
Then broke out a mighty fight,
Injuries were cruel.
Jaws broke, black eyes left and right
Kicks from Jesus' muuuu - uuuuel.
"Bring me dressings, ointment too -
Get the wounded seated.
You and I will stitch the cuts -
Get them quickly treated."
Nurse and Doctor forth they went,
With their siren wailing -
Making such a loud lament,
Transporting all the aaaaiii - aaaaiiiiling.
4.
Good King Whatsizname looked out,
There he saw a Wizard.
The snow did not lay round about,
It blew right down his gizzard!
Brightly shone the moon that night,
Though his puns were cruel,
The reason why his brain was shite,
Too much toxic gruuuuu-uuuuuuel!
"Handley Page and stand by me,
Stop that bloody yelling.
Yonder peasant, who is he?
Where and what his dwelling?"
"Sire, he lives a good league hence,
In a disused sewer.
While the toxins in his gruel,
Made his skin go bluuuuu-uuuuuuer"
"Bring me food and bring me wine,
Bring me pine logs hither,
You and I will see the swine -
Hear him start to blither!"
Page and monarch, forth they went,
To his humble dwelling.
Couldn't get too close you see,
Coz Cybe R's arse was smehhh-ehhhlling!
Hands up all those who used to sing the word "sod" in verse two extra loud
at school!
Eccles: Why would I want to put my hands up all those who used to sing the
word "sod" in verse two extra loud at school?? I'm not inter dat sort of
thing!!!!
REAL WORDS: (Nice!)
Good King Wenceslas looked out, on the Feast of Stephen,
When the snow lay round about, deep and crisp and even.
Brightly shone the moon that night, though the frost was cruel,
When a poor man came in sight, gathering winter fuel.
"Hither, page, and stand by me, if you knowst its, telling,
Yonder peasant, who is he? Where and what his dwelling?"
"Sire, he lives a good league hence, underneath the mountain,
Right against the forest fence, by Saint Agnes' fountain."
"Bring me food and bring me wine, bring me pine logs hither,
You and I will see him dine, when we bear them thither."
Page and monarch, forth they went, forth they went together,
Through the cold wind's wild lament and the bitter weather.
"Sire, the night is darker now, and the wind blows stronger,
Fails my heart, I know not how; I can go no longer."
"Mark my footsteps, my good page, tread now in them boldly,
You shall find the winter's rage freeze your blood less coldly."
In his master's steps he trod, where the snow lay dinted;
Heat was in the very sod which the saint had printed.
Therefore, Christian men, be sure, wealth or rank possessing,
You who now will bless the poor, shall yourselves find blessin